To Love and Not Woe
by LuxeriaMyst
Summary: Alec died centuries ago and how is Magnus coping up with it? Maybe a letter and an album can do the trick.


**Disclaimer:**

I do not own the characters. Some quotes here would also be from the book or the tv series.

Hope you'll enjoy it. It's been a long time since I wrote a story and published it here. :)

* * *

 **To Love And Not Woe  
(A MaLec story)**

Magnus knew this day would come. He knew that in every 'hello' was a 'goodbye'. He knew that he is immortal. He knew what he was getting into the day his eyes met those blue-colored eyes. He knew that loving a mortal wouldn't end well. And he knew that he need to keep his walls up. He knew all of that… and yet he didn't care. He still fell in love. He still cared. He helped. He believed. And he trusted. He knew that his very old friend Ragnor Fell was right. That someday, someone will break down his walls. And if ever that did happen, he should never let go.

But reality was cruel. Reality decided to play a game on him.

He met Alexander 'Alec' Gideon Lightwood.

His glamoured dark brown eyes met those blue eyes.

It was pure accidental. Their meeting. His purpose was Clary Fairchild. He was supposed to meet her then leave. But on that fateful day, he and his heart was not prepared to find a person that made his heart skip and tighten. He was not expecting to meet Alec. Their first meeting was awkward but there was a spark for both of them. They felt it but they both ignored it at first. They thought that a relationship with each other would be far from happening. Magnus, being the flirty one, was the first to make a move to show his interest. Alec, on the other hand, was too naive and oblivious that he mostly doesn't get the message.

Sure it all started as fun and games but the longer that Magnus was flirting, the deeper he realized that he was starting to fall. And when Alec started to open his heart a little, everything fell into place.

Their first date came way too long after meeting. It also took a long time for Alexander to say 'I love you'. And it took an eternity for them to finally kiss. But after that, everything went smoothly. Touching became a regular thing. Kissing and hugging became a very everyday activity for them both. If they were both busy, they would text and call whenever they were available.

It was like the Warlock has finally found the missing piece to make him whole again. After 400 years or so, he has finally found someone who would be with him seriously.

Magnus could still remember his fear of Alec finding out about his eyes and belly button. ' _They're beautiful. You're perfect.'_ These were the words that the Shadowhunter spoke during the night of their first lovemaking. Magnus had feared that there would be disgust in the other's eyes but he found none. He could only feel love from the Shadowhunter. Love and sincerity in those words. And it calmed him. Additionally, Alec did not abandon him when he found out who is Magnus' real father - Asmodeus.

Alec, on the other hand, was very nervous and worried about him being mortal, a person who has never dated before, and a virgin. Being clueless as this one was his first relationship, he had no idea what to do and he feared that he would one day die and Magnus would be left behind. The Warlock found out about these insecurities when Alec tried to search into his background and find a way to take away Magnus' immortality with the help of Camille. Although Alec never planned to go along with it, Magnus found out. The Warlock was angered by this. He felt hurt because of the lack of trust. And they broke off after.

But they were able to resolve that problem at the end. It was always like that. They fight, they apologize, they kiss, they make up - or made love if somebody asks Magnus.

* * *

" _I don't care how many people you've been with," Alec walked towards Magnus._

" _I don't care how many people you haven't been with," Magnus replied as he was wrapped in the arms of the other._

* * *

That has been it.

That was the threshold that Magnus swore he would not cross.

It was the same threshold that Imasu Morales, a musician that played the _charango_ wanted with him. Their relationship lasted but once it was cut, Magnus made no effort to repair it thinking that he cannot give Imasu what was expected from him. But with Alec, it was different.

He fell in love.

Too deep.

Too much.

There was no going back. His fate was sealed. Reality must've had enough of him playing around with other people - men and women. So they placed him as the High Warlock of Brooklyn and put Alec there in front of him. Magnus was stunned at those stunning blue eyes that held so much warmth, honesty, just, and love.

Love.

He didn't know how it was possible to live in a time like that and still hold innocence. He couldn't believe how Alec was so forgiving, loving, caring... He was the ideal guy in Magnus' eyes. What he felt for him was nothing compared to what he felt for anyone else in the past. It didn't even hold a candle against Camille during the mid-1800's!

* * *

 _Camille, the former leader of the Brooklyn Vampire Clan, walked towards the High Warlock of Brooklyn with her hips swaying side to side. She flipped her hair and placed one hand on her waist while the other was placed on top of the hands of Magnus. She hums while caressing the other person's hands. The Warlock immediately pulled away in disgust, "Stop it."_

 _"Are you still mad I left you for that other guy?" she asks, full well the answer to her question but still asked._

 _Magnus 'hmp'-ed, "I could care less. I lost all of my feelings for you centuries ago."_

 _"Love is so fleeting when you are immortal, specially if it is true love." Camille grins, "Or do you think you've found it?"_

 _Magnus just stood still - frozen - while the female vampire circled around him. She sniffed his clothes before laughing loudly, "I smell an angel; a Nephilim. Oh my! A Shadowhunter!"_

 _The Warlock growls at her which made Camille grin wider. Magnus tried to calm himself and looked at the vampire with a cold stare, "Look here, you may have given me a past, but Alec is my future. So bug off."_

* * *

That was one of the rare times that he got a bit pissed at somebody. That was the end of his relationship with her. If that wasn't a clearer sign, sending her to the Clave did. And with her out of the picture, nobody in Magnus' side complained or argued about his relationship with Alec. It just took a long time to get the blessings from the other's parents; specially with their mind-set in Downworlders being people who are lower than them because of their appearance and /or demon blood.

But that didn't stop them. Besides, not everyone in Alec's side was against their bond.

* * *

 _"Congrats man! I never expected that from you," Jace wraps an arm around Alec's neck._

 _Izzy squealed, "I knew it! Congratulations big bro! I knew this would happen sooner or later."_

* * *

Magnus gave his precious Shadowhunter everything - his heart, body, and soul.

And when Alec died, something that they both dread and knew that was inevitable will come, everything about Magnus died along with him. He cried a river that day.

* * *

" _You know Magnus," Alec started, "I always wondered what my life would be if I haven't met you."_

 _Magnus hummed in response, "As for me, I always asked myself what I did to have you by my side. Cause if memory serves me right, I was a bit of a troublemaker in the past."_

" _Aw come one. You couldn't have been THAT bad," the Shadowhunter defended._

 _Magnus grinned, "Wanna bet?"_

* * *

He could still remember the shock in Alec's face when he found out about some things about Magnus. Not just the mischief that he did but also some of the things that the Warlock did. Alec expressed his disbelief that Magnus was even involved in historical events and even knew some well-known historical people. Specially when he found out how Magnus was banned from Peru from some unexplained reason.

Magnus walked over to the shelves near the couch and brushed his fingers against some old and familiar books and albums. He stopped when he found a specific black album with golden fonts and golden borders. He took it out and sat at his usual seat. Magnus took a deep breath and looked down at the album in his hands: 'To My Beloved'. He let out a soft chuckle when he remembered the day that his Alec gave it to him.

* * *

" _This is for you," Alec said as he hands a small gift._

 _Magnus tilts his head to the side in question, "What for? Is today something special?"_

 _The black-haired male smiles, "Everyday is special when I'm with you."_

" _You've changed into a sweet-talker through the years," Magnus laughs but accepts the gift nonetheless. He opens the gift and sees an onyx album with golden trimmings and a golden font that read 'To My Beloved'. He gasps at the beauty of the album and decides to open it. At the very first page is a letter for him that is handwritten by none other than Alec himself._

" _I thought that this would at least help you in the future after…" Alec couldn't continue but Magnus understands immediately what he is trying to imply. It is the hard reality for the both of them._

' _...after he is gone…'_

 _Magnus pulls Alec closer and presses their foreheads together, "I don't even want to think about that now. Remember what I said before? About all of this?"_

" _How could I forget?" Alec smiles, "You told me that we will live in the present."_

 _The warlock grins, "And I could still remember those hot kisses you gave me afterwards."_

 _Alec laughs._

* * *

That was his life. Their life. It was supposed to have a happy ending. Sure they got married late into their union (because Magnus wanted to wait until the marriage between Downworlders and Shadowhunters were official) but they were already acting married just after a few months that Alec moved to Magnus'. Magnus laughed as he could still remember how Izzy wanted to be the one to plan their wedding and reception. Alec paled at the thought of his baby sister handling it but before he could say anything, Magnus agreed with the condition that he would be involved in planning. Izzy, being the lovable shadowhunter, took the offer.

The Warlock opened the album and saw some dust have infiltrated his treasure. He blew them away and quickly saw photos of him and his precious Alexander. He could feel his chest tighten at the thought that this is actually happening. Here he is, sitting on his sofa, legs crossed, remembering the past. He never reminisced much since his past was something he didn't like. But it isn't the case now.

He looked at the goofy smiles and grins he showed in these photos. It was like he didn't recognize himself anymore. Now he was back to his pale and colorless life. He was back to his old routines before getting involved with the Shadowhunters: High Warlock of Brooklyn, partying, making potions, etc.

"I wonder what you will say to me if you see me like this," he said a loud to no one in particular.

As he flipped through the pages of the album, seeing his life full of smiles, mischief, and love, he could feel tears starting to form in his eyes. While flipping to the next page, a small dirty white envelope fell from in between the pages. His eyes widened at the fallen paper. When was that ever there?

He took the envelope and looked if anything was written on it. It was old and worn out from old age. At the front part, Magnus could recognize the hand writing of Alec. He used a bit of his magic and restored the old paper to the way it originally was.

'For My Handsome Flirtatious Warlock That Love Sparkles'

Magnus laughed at this. He could hear his husband's voice as if Alec is reading it there and now.

* * *

 _My Sparkling Husband that may look like a mess or will be by the end of this letter,_

Magnus chuckled, "You know me well, my dear."

 _I know that you might be depressed over the years. And if you're still reading this letter after centuries of my death, then it means that either you just found it or you've been stopping yourself from reading it. The truth is, as much as you miss me, you have to be more optimistic. I'm not saying that you have to forget me - don't. I'm sorry for this. I haven't been good with words but I've been practicing. I hope that at least half of what I mean gets to you thru this letter._

 _First of all, know that I love and I will watch over you. Love, you don't need to weep for my death. No need to woe. Know that I loved you, am still loving you, and will continue to love you. That was my promise to you the day we got together - before we got married, during our wedding, and everyday after that._

 _Second, I don't want to be the source of your depression. Find some fun. You're Magnus Bane! The High Warlock of Brooklyn and a real mean party thrower! Have fun! Meet other people! Please don't seal yourself from other people. Don't hate the world. Because I love it. I love the world that gave me the person who I love the most - you. I love it because it made us meet each other. I love it because every problem we faced made us stronger. And most of all, I love it because it gave us Max and Raf._

 _Third, make sure you raise our sons well. I know I made you promise that you will do it but I just want to remind you with this letter. And if something does happen, then don't blame yourself. I know how accident prone those two are. Remember when we were trying to raise them as normal as possible and they go off doing something else? Well, I am pretty sure they would be attracting trouble even when they grow up._

 _Although, after everything I've said, there is one thing that I regret: we never got to Peru. I wanted to go there with you, Max, and Raf. But you just have to piss off the high-ranking people there, you were banned. I didn't want to go there without you and so does our sons despite you persisting that it was okay to leave you behind._

 _And if ever you find yourself falling in love again, then please do. I don't want to be the last relationship in your long life. Live life. You gave it to me and I would hate to think that I stole yours. You are my world and I felt really blessed to have met, fallen in love, and married you. I still want you to have happiness. Once you meet that person, I want you to make sure that he or she is right for you. I don't want you regretting anything. Be happy. Please. For me. For Raf and Max. And most specially, for you._

 _Continue to love and not woe at my departure. Smile. And know that I am and will continue to watch over you._

 _With love,_

 _Alexander Lightwood-Bane_  
 _Your Nephilim Shadowhunter Husband_

 _P.S. I am not a stalker. I am just a worried husband._

* * *

The letter sealed the deal. Tears were falling. He couldn't stop them from continuously flowing out from his eyes. He could still imagine Alec's voice saying these things to him. He could see those onyx hair and blue-colored eyes looking at his own cat eyes. He laughed at the last part though, "Not good with words? I say you've improved over the years."

If it was not already bad enough, he remembered that during the happiest times of his life, he lost almost everyone. He thanked whatever or whoever was watching over him that at least he still had one person left in his life. His son, Max.

The arrival of both Max and Rafael made Magnus' and Alec's life more beautiful and exciting if that was even possible. Max was a warlock so he was immortal as well. Max Michael Lightwood-Bane or Magnus' blueberry. Max was the first addition to Magnus' and Alec's family life. As soon as Alec saw the boy, he had the feeling of protectiveness and love towards the child. And when he proposed to Magnus about adopting the boy, the warlock agreed as he did not want the child to fall into the hands of abusive people, a.k.a. The Clave. Magnus could still remember the day that Max called out to him "Papa" and Alec "Dad". Both of them felt so proud. As if things weren't gonna get better, another child joined the family.

* * *

 _"Yeay! I get to have a brother!" Max cheers, excitement in his voice._

 _"Hi..." a young boy greets awkwardly._

* * *

Rafael Santiago Lightwood-Bane or also called as 'Raf' mainly by his younger adoptive brother. Raf, on the other hand, was a Shadowhunter; a mundane. Raf was taken in by Alec and Magnus when the Shadowhunter met the child in one of his missions. Having learned of his past and what he went through, both males took him in as their son. Raf and Max got along so well and there were no hate despite them different from each other.

Magnus felt more tears coming when he remembered what happened to Rafael. It happened right after Alec's death. Raf went in a mission. It was an ambush. They weren't expecting it. Raf got serious wounds and he eventually died of blood loss. Raf's girlfriend cried hard that time. And so did Max. But Magnus took it harder. He just lost his husband a few months ago and he still haven't recovered from it. And now he just lost a son. Magnus felt like a failure. He promised in Alec's deathbed that he would protect their children for as long as he could.

* * *

 _"Make sure they don't follow me too soon," Alec says weakly, "I love you all but I don't want any of you to lose your life so quickly."_

 _Magnus' tears starts to fall at this point. He grips the shadowhunter's hands tightly and brought it to his lips, "I promise, my love."_

 _And after that, Alec's heart has stopped beating._

* * *

Magnus sighs. No use regretting and hating himself now. It has been five decades since everything happened. Speaking of decades, it is their anniversary today.

"Happy anniversary, my lovely Shadowhunter," Magnus says out of thin air while caressing a certain photo of the said person. He looks at his watch and sees that it is already past 8 in the evening, "I wonder where he is..."

"Hi Papa! Sorry for being late."

The Warlock looks behind him and sees his baby blueberry grinning. Max removes his jacket and scarf before entering the penthouse. He has matured over the years both physically and mentally. He stopped growing when he hit his early 20's thus still looks very much young despite being more that 60 years old. He has grown taller and is almost the same height as Magnus. He is very slim yet you can tell that his body is quite toned. As he hangs his jacket at the rack, Max un-glamours himself which turned his tan skin to his original blue-ish skin color and his horns appeared.

"So where to this time? I'm starving!" he complains, "Not to mention I skipped lunch...". He launches himself to the couch and tackles his dear papa.

Magnus laughs at the act that his son is showing. He felt nothing but pride that his son has grown so much and yet stayed the same little blueberry that he and Alec took in. "And what did I say about eating properly?" he asked playfully.

Max stood up and tried to copy what his papa always told him and his brother. He stands up straight, puts his left hand on his waist while his other hand was pointing towards Magnus. "You have to eat properly or else no books for Max and no gym for Raf for a week," Max recalls by heart.

Magnus grins, "Good that you can still remember that."

"Why wouldn't I? First time that happened, we were going crazy," Max shrugs his shoulders. "So, are you ready papa?"

"Yeah. Let me just put this back to the bookshelf," he replies as he shows his son the album.

Max' eyes widened, "Isn't that the one with you photos with dad? You were reminiscing about the past?"

Magnus nodded and he put it back to where it belongs. Back at the other albums. To the other albums that was also made by Alec. Each and every album decorated and full of memories. Magnus takes a look around the room and went towards the doors where his son is waiting for him. They both wore their jackets and scarfs before leaving the penthouse.

* * *

 **A/N:**

I hope you enjoyed this short story and my take when Alec dies and leaves behind Magnus. As I said at the first part, these are based on both the tv series and some in the books. But for some scenes here, I just added it for more flavor and background.


End file.
